SHAKEN

The dictionary definition of shaken is being frightened, scared, worried, or nervous. But, is being shaken such a bad thing when it comes to my faith?? When God shakes up my faith, yes, I may feel a little nervous or worried, not knowing what He is doing or where He is taking me. But, it grows me in my faith and makes me depend on Him all the more.
There have been many times in my life when I feel God has shaken my faith up. It was scary, but deep down I knew God had me in His arms and was working all things for my good, even though I couldn’t see it at the time. Recently, my whole family has been shaken up! We moved to another state, where we knew no one at all. I grew up in NC and that is all I have ever known. God has brought us way out of our comfort zone and has stretched our faith. I am also homeschooling for the first time. I was always the one to say I could never do that and here I am! Never tell God what you are going to or not going to do or He WILL shake you up!! It has been a very humbling experience for all of us and my prayer life has increased because of it, begging God to please take the wheel and help me to be a more creative homeschool mom and less of a yelling one when my kiddos don’t do their work. At times it is lonely here, even with all of the chaos of 4 kiddos running around. We are getting to know more people, but we still terribly miss our peeps from back home.
When my husband first told me that it was official; they were shutting down their job site, I stomped my feet, cried, and basically told him and God that I was staying put and not moving anywhere else, because NC is all I had ever known and I was very comfy where I was at, thank you very much! Well, like I said, never tell God what you are going to do or not do without consulting Him first. During that very unstable time in our lives, I was truly shaken to the core. There were many restless nights, not knowing where we were going to be or if my husband would find another job. I thought long and hard about how I could change my feelings and have a different attitude. I realized that worrying was not going to find my husband a job and just wore me down. I finally began to pray the word PEACE. It wasn’t overnight, but over some time, I slowly began to feel God’s peace blanket my soul and comfort me. I slowly gave over my feelings to Him and let Him take over. I could envision Jesus standing in our future, with His arms open wide, a smile on His face, and saying, “I am already in your future. I have got this thing. Walk in faith not sight.” My Pastor’s wife told me one time that as a Christian, God has already given us His Peace. We have it. But we must make the choice to live in it, internalizing that Peace in our souls. Oh.My.Goodness!! God just spoke straight through her. I did, eventually, feel that peace and did my best to rest in it. You know, that “peace that surpasses ALL understanding.” I still don’t understand some days why we are here in TN, but God does. And that is ok. I can look back and see how God had us in His arms the whole time. It was a crazy time, but God got us through finding another job, moving (which was totally INSANE!), and finding homeschool curriculum and help from an umbrella school. We are still learning lessons all the time. I know God has a purpose for everything He does and we are here for a reason. Many times God brings us WAY out of our comfort zones for His purposes and to shake up our faith, which helps us to grow up in Him. So, I am doing my best to bloom where God has planted me, meet new people, get involved in our new church, and be a better homeschool mom! I am trying to not think about the future in terms of my husband’s job and if this one will be stable for years. Only God knows that. I pray that we will be here for a while and that God will use us for His Glory, to bring people to Him. Shake me up, LORD, and help me to continue to grow up, and be firmly rooted in You and Your amazing Word!